Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Harper's Afghanistan

Minimum number of rip-offs of the famed Harper's Index: 2
Area of Afghanistan: 652,230 sq km
Area of Vietnam: 331,210 sq km
Minimum number of MACV/American troops present in half of Vietnam at the height of the "Vietnam War": 500,000
Maximum number of ISAF/NATO/American troops present in Afghanistan now: 100,000
Minimum density of White Guy troops in Vietnam: 1.51/sq km
Minimum density of White Guy troops in Afghanistan: 0.15/sq km
Ratio of White Guys in Vietnam/Afghanistan (absolute minimum): 10:1
Population of China: 1,330,141,295 (July 2010 est.)
Minimum Chinese population that is Muslim: 13,301,413
Minimum number of years the Americans were in Vietnam: 12
Manner of leaving: Chaos
Minimum number of years that ISAF has been in Afghanistan: 9
Manner of leaving: TBA
Number of years that Chinese troops have been in Afghanistan: 0
Manner of leaving: N/A
Value of mining properties developed in Afghanistan by NATO countries: 0
By China: $US 4 billion
Cost borne by China: 0
Threat to the world posed by Afghanistan as estimated by NATO:
By China: 0
Maximum number of clearly defined criteria for leaving Afghanistan;
By the UN: 0
By ISAF: 0
By NATO: 0
By the United Kingdom: 0
By the United States: 0
By Canada: Ask Obama
Minimum number of friendly jokes made by Stephen Harper at the "hanging" of Jean Chrétien: 1
Maximum number of friendly jokes made at the Nuremberg hanging of Wilhem Keitel: 0
Minimum number of Canadian troops killed in Afghanistan: 146
Minimum number of Canadian troops wounded in Afghanistan: [secret]